What a morbidly obese eats for dinner!!!/ Ali in a car accident!!!!!!
Feb 9, 2019
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6a7R1L-nRYE

it's over it's all lettuce with a little
bit of my dressing and then steak my
gosh you guys what does a pan
oh my gosh I can honestly say today has
just been one of those days that I
caught some really really really good
vibes from all directions so the last
couple days you guys know that I've been
struggling a little bit
um just within the youtube world to just
you know just kind of going through some
stuff and you know I'm human it's gonna
happen and and that's just the T of it
all you know and not allowing the
circumstances that I've been coming
against me - honestly affect me has just
been the thing um however I'm gonna say
that honestly the last couple of days I
have I really really in this last
because I started my life journey in
July I will honestly say that the last
I'm probably gonna say thank you any men
probably from the time that I started my
life journey this last couple of days
have been my hardest since then and I
think just because you know things are
becoming more real and my channels
growing up a little bit which is great
don't think that I don't like it I love
a channel growing but with that comes a
new type of territory that I'm happening
to learn how to you know navigate and
I'm getting recognized by other people
and that's amazing I love the feeling in
fact I just got off of a live now I'm
gonna just claim this right here I'm
just gonna put this out there because I
want everybody to know okay
I don't go into everybody's Lane okay
everybody's beef is among themselves I
save my own lane what one person is
dealing with I'm not gonna put into my
package and hold it and I'm not gonna
take from my package and put it into
other people's Lane because you know in
fact that's just how life works and so I
understand that some people have beef
and issues with other people but it
doesn't mean that I have to personally
have problems with anybody I just you
know I stay neutral I really do and that
is just how my motto of life is you know
and so anyways with that and the reason
I disclaim this is because this person
is um this person's our reviewer and
this person has done reviews on certain
people and some of those people are on
my channel and it doesn't mean that I
have to agree to everything that this
reviewer has said nor have I can I
always agree with everything that the
youtuber has done you know I mean we all
have our highs we all have our lows we
all have our strengths we all have our
weaknesses I mean that's just being a
human and that's just being normal
anywho so beyond all of that um I just
came from Zachary Michaels Channel and
he has a reviewer and he was like hey
Amy I heard you made a channel or a
video about me and I'm like video about
you and I'm thinking I never mentioned
his name in any of my videos at least
you know I've watched him for a long
time but I don't remember ever seeing
his name well I went back and I think
what he was referring to was I made a
video about reviewers and that's the
only thing that I can remotely think
someone would have again assumed that I
made it about him and it wasn't about
him in fact it was about somebody
totally I didn't even think about him
until he said that I made a video about
him and he made it clear you know he
hasn't watched the video or anything he
wanted to stop by my channel so Zachary
if you stopped by hello I'm so happy to
have you here just like I'm happy to
have everybody here and so does my food
just to show you guys really quick
this is huge I don't know why my husband
made this so big I nearly will not be
able to eat all this but it's a steak
salad it's over it's all lettuce with a
little bit of my dressing and then steak
but that's enough for like three times
the amount that I need to eat but that's
so good
my husband's a sweetheart and the fact
that he made it it's all worth it he was
actually gonna bring me home dinner Baja
Fresh well you know what I'm glad he
didn't because salad is just as good um
anyways back to what I was saying so I
love everybody you know no there's no
negative people that I can view well I'm
gonna say there's there's a few that I
can know that I can say that i view
differently but you know for the most
part I love everybody and just because
one has an issue and know that review
channel and like our that review video i
honest-to-god can say was not about
Zachary had nothing to do with Zachary
Michael it was actually a couple other
channels that I was referring to but I
don't need to get into that because it's
not again I don't feel the need to
spotlight the channels that I was
talking about it was just ah you know I
don't you know it's each to their own
how you run your channel everybody does
their own thing all I told Zachary is he
better be nice to me because he does do
reviews and I'm like don't you do a
negative review on me sir but no um you
know everybody does life in their own
way and you know what I am allowed as an
individual to love everybody the way I
want to love everybody and nobody can
dictate that but nobody has to dictate I
cannot dictate what others do either so
it's a given it's a take so anyways -
Utley wanted to clarify that because he
said he's gonna be coming by and
checking my channel out and I want to
make it very clear that video was not
about you and I could promise that
it was definitely not even about the
person that Zachary does reviews about
it was actually a total different
channel Zachary has never even talked
about I don't know he may not even know
that they exist so therefore no the
video was not about Zachary but I was so
excited to be able to talk to him that
was great that was an amazing feeling
it's so nice to be able to talk to such
amazing people you know with life by
jinn and I've talked to Chantal and if
you don't know okay hold on let me go
back because some people don't know them
by their names life by Jin I say Jen
sorry Chantel which is foodie beauty
then there's Zachary Michael and living
with the web's which is Olivia who else
have I talked to I know I'm forgetting a
whole bunch and I'm sorry but it's been
nice lately stepping into that kind of
that realm in that circle of feeling
like okay you know what I'm being able
to gear and gain new friendships so that
it's amazing and I am one that can hold
a friendship within myself I don't mix
my friendships in with each other so I
can keep clear of you know mixing things
with other people but it's such an
amazing feeling to be able to have such
amazing people all on my channel I don't
have Zachary Michael on my channel yet
but Zach if you're showing your best
best best add me anyways on to the next
thing
um but no today has been a really great
day I really just took today down just
took it down a notch and me and the kids
were home all he had a doctor's
appointment today which is so odd for my
husband because he does not go to the
doctor but my hubby hims wasn't feeling
good so he he did he went to the
doctor's which I stayed home with the
kids cuz we don't like taking the kids
unless we absolutely unless they have an
appoint them themselves we do not take
the kids to the doctor
randomly take them in with us because we
have an appointment
you know we figure were we're big kids
so we can we can take ourselves unless
you're like me and pass it at the wall
we'll mmm don't know if that was the
safest thing for me but you know we
learned our lesson
um Oh what else oh yes he took himself
to the doctor and they gave him some
antibiotics so hopefully that will start
helping but he's just not feeling too
hot which is just so not like him um
what are their exciting news oh then I'm
sitting here my husband leaves to go
have dinner with a friend
he owes me he's like babe I'm like what
he had just locked within like five ten
minutes Wow
so I was sitting here at the light and
minding my own business and all of a
sudden BAM somebody come flying into me
I'm like what he's like yeah somebody
come and hit me from behind he's like I
don't know it scared the crap out of me
I'm like oh my god I'm like are you okay
first question are you okay he's like
yes I'm okay I'm just really shaken but
yeah I'm okay
he's like but those Ford flexes they're
built really good like why of course
that's what we have I'm like why he's
like well because the guys truck was
pretty totaled from the front and he
goes but he did nothing to our car I'm
like honey honey and did you check about
our backup you know cameras are working
he's like yeah I checked everything
everything's fine we're fine on our part
but he has a problem I'm like oh God
so yes that is a wonderful not so good
call to get from your spouse when
they're out driving and you get the call
honey I've been in a car accident like
no because the first thing I could think
of is picturing what happened to us
a year and a half ago when dumb dumb
over here ran a red light
I blew through it stupid mistake on my
part but because of that we had our
and it was a nasty nasty accident I was
taken by ambulance my babies were okay
thank God and Ollie was okay but my car
was completely totaled that's why we had
to get the flags was because my
expedition was completely demolished I
mean I hit this lady hard no I was going
full speed I seen the light pre like so
here's my light it was the light behind
it in the next intersection that's the
light I was looking at instead of
looking at our light and that light had
turned green
so I just kept going and I'll never
forget Jeremy I was like mommy it's red
and just as he said that BAM I mean we
just we hit hard because she was going
her speed that because she had just
started you know and or no no no no
sorry she was already going because I
was supposed to come to a stop so her
light was already green she was already
going and I just slammed right kissing
her right in the front end so I totaled
out our expedition so that was like the
first thing I thought about was that my
car was totaled again and I will
honestly say the Flex has been my
favorite car so I really would have been
sad had something really happened to it
and having a husband in the car industry
does not mean you get a free car no
we're paying a pretty penny for our flex
um so anyways it whoa that type of call
is just like one that just sends you
over the edge like why why why do you
call like that um but other than that
phone call we had a really good good day
starting in terrain which I heard
that we are supposed to be getting a
snowstorm a bad snowstorm so FY there is
a new set of orders I will be contacting
the were the order people
I will not probably be able if the
snowstorm happens like it's supposed to
we're supposed to get a pretty good
amount I refused because of like what
happened today except today there was no
snow on the ground um we refused to go
out so if that's the case I will not be
able to get anything out to the post
office but as soon as it clears up I
will get stuff out but I do have a whole
new set of orders that are supposed to
go out I think that's it I mean this
weekend is probably gonna be a pretty
chill weekend if like I said if we
remotely have any type of a snow storm
like they're calling for we're gonna be
hanging in the house for most of it
because mom ain't going out and I'm not
taking my babies out they can go out and
play
gotta get those socks clean again for
their hands get those trash bags ready
for the slides
um but yeah that's really good we just
had a really relaxing cool day I really
just enjoy today it was a nice catch for
all like it was just a day that I was
able just to relax um I'm excited to sit
tonight and work on um what else we got
our story time that we need to read
really quick
okay yesterday okay okay so today's
reading is just because your grandma
grandpa
mama daddy didn't believe in therapy
doesn't mean you shouldn't seek the
mental health treatment you need how you
Hill is your choice wholly criminally
Wow
that is so darn I had loved this book
I don't read this before I read it with
you guys so everything that I read is
the same time you guys are hearing it
that is so true though like you know I
know that there are people that are
against like getting help for depression
because they say well you don't lean on
your your faith and leave you know lean
on God and he's there to help you
through it and it's like okay great
wonderful you know I get it but I I also
you know mental health is a very very
very serious thing and you know for a
very long time I think that I should
have had mental health help a long time
prior to when I finally had my complete
manic episode where I literally tried to
commit suicide it was very very very
scary and I don't know if I've shared
that story with you guys and if I
haven't let me know and it's maybe
something I can share with you guys it's
very very very scary and touching but
it's definitely very serious you know
and so having that having that help has
been able to help me when I reached out
finally and said I'm not okay and it's
okay to say I am NOT okay and to go to
your doctor and get the help for the
things that are you know causing the
problems and reaching out to a therapist
and you know I've been in therapy for
almost two years and I could not
honestly imagine life without having
that like I honestly honestly honestly
not imagine life without having my
therapist in my life because she has
helped me so much with so much of my you
know PTSD and you know my binging that I
do when I'm you know going through my
really hard times you know my weight
issues and everything in between
she has always always always been able
to help me grow the tool she doesn't do
the work for me that's the thing is that
therapy is not about having it done for
you you have to do it yourself because
if you don't do it yourself you're not
gonna learn um but there are people that
are like oh my god you don't need to
have a therapist you don't need to go to
therapy and it's like why not like what
am i I didn't know I was too good to say
that I'm not okay and I need a therapist
like I went through a lot as a child and
there's been people that I've had worse
than I did and you know I think
therapists are I think therapists are
something that you can never ever ever
ever say they will never be needed
because they are sometimes the lifeline
between you and death like as in they
help you stay alive because sometimes
you just feel so low that you just want
to disappear you want to leave this
earth the problems and everything that
you're going through or had gone through
and just feel normal is the thought in
the back of your mind but when it all
comes down to it it's you personally
doing the work yourself
but that therapist helping you grow so
strong that you can literally make it
through anything but a lot of people
don't believe in them they think that
they're cool you know they're just
something that's a waste of space but
therapists to me are one of the most
important things in this world
especially these days because there are
so many people that's
for for mental health that go unseen
because they're too afraid or too
embarrassed to go and ask for help and
receive that hope that they need and so
please don't ever ever allow somebody to
tell you that getting help and going to
a therapist and being able to work on
yourself that that's wrong or that makes
you weak or that makes you not a human
it actually is the complete opposite to
reach out and say I'm not okay and I
need someone to help me that makes you
the strongest person ever that makes you
that just to me I see that as somebody
that's standing on top of the world if
you can be brave enough to reach out and
say hey I need that help and know that
the therapists are there to help you and
that they're not gonna cause problems
for you or they're not gonna hurt you
they're not gonna set out to you know do
something bad you know that they're
there to help you but see a lot of times
I think people that discourage others
too for going to therapists is because
they're afraid of the truth coming out
and that their flaws might be shown in
the end and that's the truth of it you
know and that is true because it's
happened to me you know my therapist has
shown light you just need to know that
you know it will sometimes shine light
on people's flaws that don't want to be
seen but that's not your fault that's
not your problem you can't carry their
burdens because they're embarrassed all
you can do is worry about yourself and
worry about your state of mind and let
it take its course on what its gonna do
to other people's so anywho I know I
only took a few bites on my salad I'm
going to sit here and finish my dinner
but I just wanted to check in with you
guys and close my night and say that I
am just so excited for all the amazing
connections I've made today and talked
to some amazing people and continued on
living life growing strong learning to
grow those tools in your toolbox to make
the best I can and I will check in with
you guys tomorrow bright and shiny in
the morning I don't know how the weather
is gonna be but I'm hoping and praying
that it doesn't drop snow and I know
it's probably going to but I don't want
to do so anyways I will check in with
you guys at some point tomorrow morning
or tomorrow afternoon but I will be here
for sure check in with you guys and let
you know how things are going
sweet dreams you guys bye bye
